Everyday Musings > Guest Relations

V and I had guests over today. From the moment we know they're expected till the time they ring the doorbell, we inevitably live their lives and see what they would see, need or feel - dusting top shelves if it's going to be a tall guest, scanning for sharp objects if a child is coming along, double checking if a shaking chair leg has been fixed if it's someone elderly, keeping spare toothbrushes handy if someone is staying on, laying out bathroom slippers to keep feet dry, keeping a bottle in to chill if they prefer their water cold - entertaining guests has cultivated an outside eye into our world and theirs. The little rituals help us walk through unfamiliar doors till we understand and embrace another side.

As I sat down after the day was done, I wondered about guests and hosts. Of both as familiar strangers who form a symbiotic pact to nurture one another every time they meet. We have no dearth of guests in India; when the mortal ones are not visiting, the immortal ones are invited over - we paint Rangolis, light lamps and incense, have all nighters with music and devotional songs - in the hope that good fortune will visit us again and again. We are taught to be good hosts regardless of our circumstance in life and how much we may have or not have.

It led me back into my own life. I recollected how I was, reflected on how I am and imagined how I would be and realised that I had played host to a lot of I's. Had I been a generous host or was I stingy about exhausting all I had? Had I held back because of prejudice and inner conflict? Had I entertained and enjoyed their company? Some I's were long-awaited guests (I finally feel wise after all these years), some surprise guests (I had no idea I could make such a big move), some cherished guests (I was so free spirited when I was 19), some unwanted(I hate myself right now). Some I had been gracious with, some I had rushed through, some I hadn't understood at all, some I still loved. Each 'I' was a familiar stranger, me but not me. As if I had walked in their shoes awhile, then said goodbye and moved houses.

There is a new 'I' visiting soon. I'm busy organising a bit of clutter, dusting some old beliefs, wiping off a bit of hesitation and picking a new menu for thought. The doorbell is ringing. It's time to be a new host.