Everyday Musings > Googly

A friend, today, told me of an advertisement for a Church that he saw. It said "there are some questions that Google can't answer" I decided to test their claim.

But first what is that the Church believes Google cannot answer. God, faith, where do we come from, retribution, life, love, society. Let's see what Google has to say.

First up, God.

530,000,000 results that ranged from What or Who is God on Wikipedia to a website called doesgodexist.com to God TV to Why won't God heal amputees to God's yellow pages (meaning the Bible) to Egyptian Gods, Jewish Gods, Indian Gods ... the whole internet seems to be talking God. The church people should actually have a website of their own here. Do online advertising to combat Google. Maybe even launch their own personal God search engine, with answers.

That query exhausted, I moved onto Faith. 184,000,000 results. Where do we come from? 76,200,000. Amen. 28,200,000. And so on till every God question was a mass of results.

That got me thinking. Is there anything that Google will not throw up any result on? I tried. 'Aliens fall in love" 106 results, "Ouch" 19,000,000, "Hmm" 103,000,000 – this was hilarious. And profound.

Searches show up because they are people out there feeding it content, filling it up with things we can't even imagine. Got me wondering on the weirdest things that people would have ever searched for. Googled. There are plenty of lists online. One had a countdown of the 20 best. Here are the 20, reproduced, as is, rated A for use of language.

"Khmer women dark skin beautiful, crotch deep in mud (what?) , Become your girlfriend, Are tall girls pretty, Best sex tall guy short girl, Bukake, Attractive successful guy (sigh), Ashleigh brilliant if your careful enough nothing good or bad will ever happen to you, Anyone found the fat cure(ya right), Become success in days. Advertising a hose to stick up your bum to cleanse & refresh. Are g strings dangerous. Excuses on why I took your girlfriend. How to become a gigolo? dog fart protein, man-thing naked, penis tucking for cross dressers. How to give a gay head job, does acting gay to hang out with women work (what kind of a creep is this!) and finally what made it to number one - place to have gay sex with horses.(sheesh)"

That was some list. I can't believe people actually googled the things they did. I tried the query 'are g strings dangerous' and actually came up with facts supporting it, including a lady who's sued Victoria's Secret for selling her a malfunctioning one. How to become a gigolo actually shows up tutorials on it. And Anyone found the fat cure actually says yes. Amazing. The things I didn't know existed in here.

But I have questions to ask Google. Why throw up so many results? When was the last time someone checked page no 12,000,000. But Google would probably say 'God is in the details'. Is it so Father?